bleucommelhiver:

[ NYX ULRIC WEEK ] day 7: heart & duty » AS LONG AS I HAVE STRENGTH IN MY BODY;
       ❝ he burns like a star in its final hours, effulgent & luminous ❞ 

“Why do I fight?” he repeats with a sad smile. It’s a question he’s asked himself countless times – on the battlefield in the face of death, on the verge of intoxication in the sanctuary of liquor, in the deluge of his memories, ghosts that never rest even in slumber.

When father passed, he fought for vengeance. To bring justice to his father’s murderers – the damned Nifs that dragged their small country into turmoil. And for what? The mere convenience of a naval base 100 miles off the shores of their enemies? Thousands of lives lost for a tiny piece of land.

When Selena passed, he fought in guilt. To right his wrongs. To be the big brother he vowed to be, but never was. The accusing eyes of a broken mother too much for him to bear, he fled in guise of fighting.

When Crowe passes, it is the future he fights for. 

Or so he says when the princess with the doleful eyes asks in a much too tired voice.

But what is a future of blood and ashes when your family’s in the ground?

It is nothing.

But he holds on to his heroism, just for one last day.

Because fighting is the only thing left Nyx Ulric knows how to do.