promtease:

Game Night With the Chocobros! Pt. 1: The snack situation.

This is not serious at all.

• OK well as soon as someone suggested game night, you knew that the whole food situation was going to be a hellish task for Ignis. So when he asks you if you could assist him (he’s a real busy guy), your eyes rolled right out of your skull and down the sidewalk like that ravioli can in the old Chef Boyardee commercial.
• Although you did your best (your best meaning you texted them all about what they wanted to have for dinner that night, and then let them battle it out while you were at work.) they all seemed to have different ideas about what was appropriate. Prom and Noct were very excited about the idea of just having a snack marathon until they passed out on your floor in front of the TV. Iggy thought it’d be better if you all had an actual meal. Yanno how that man’s always looking out for nutrition. That’s just part of his job.
• You came home from work on the second day to an Ignis who was ready to eat his own gloves in frustration, practically begging the group chat to AT LEAST agree on some form of dinner with substance. Something. Anything more than what was at your nearest convenient store.
• Gladio was rather quiet. Occasionally those three little dots appeared next to his name and then disappeared as if he had something to say and was too afraid to say it.
• Prompto conveniently dropped out of the chat when he realized that he could not diffuse the situation with silly gifs of cats.
• “We cannot survive off of cheese puffs and monster energy alone. You do this every night.” Ignis insisted. “Choose an actual meal. I doubt our friend wants to spend all of their earnings on snacks for you.”
• “No!” Noct replied, and continued just to piss Iggy off even further. “I want my insides to rot! AND I’ll pay Y/N.”
• insert obnoxious emoji here.
• Gladiolus then sent in one simple text that saved your entire life, and kind of made you want to kiss him a little.
• “Y/N, just order a damn pizza. Now, would you all shut up? It’s 11pm.”
• So that’s it right? A couple of pizzas would totally be fine. What a great idea! Right?
• Right?
• The day comes where you’re all piled into your tiny living room. The bros are all off to the side trying to agree on the first game of the night while you’re slouched into the crease in the sofa, listing off topping after topping as slowly as you can for the poor, clueless teenager taking your order.
• It’s a surprising amount of pizza for only five people, but then again your four besties are still growing boys. Young men? Whatever. Gladio can easily down two pizzas without even thinking about it, and Noctis can just inhale around a cardboard box and vacuum up any food that might be inside so yanno. Gotta be prepared.
• Anyways. Noctis shuffles up beside of you at one point, a little closer than usual, but you don’t think much of it because the dude on the other end of the phone has gotten Prompto’s order wrong three times in a row now and you’re cursing the whole restaurant for not having an online order option like civilized folk.
• It’s not until his chin lands on your shoulder that you really notice his presence, and one glance over shows you that he’s sporting the biggest, shiniest Caelum puppy dog eyes™ that he can manage. His stupid, wobbling bottom lip is almost cute. It would have definitely been cute, if you couldn’t smell the deception from a mile away.
• “Noctis?” You sigh, already exhausted as you politely cover the phone’s mic.
• “Yes, Y/n?”
• “You’re not about to ask if I can go get snacks for you when I’m already buying pizza, right?”
• “Weeeelllll.” This prince is so spoiled and you can’t blame anyone bc you’re definitely part of the problem. You’re genuinely going to put your shoes on and go to the convenient store in your PJ’s for him.
• Again.
• Ignis whips his head around a full 180 degrees and makes eye contact with you just as you snatch your keys up, and before you can make up some ridiculous excuse he’s holding out a list for you to take with you.
• This man tried his best, and still prepared for y’all to be covered in Cheeto dust by the end of the night. In his eyes you see pain. A deep sadness.
• The list is fairly simple. Chips. A few candy bars. A six pack of soda. (A can of Ebony.) Easy.
• Then you had to go and be a good friend and ask the room for any other suggestions. What a mistake.
• Noct snatches the list from your hands like a rabid racoon, chicken scratching a long line of items down the page as if you have enough arms to carry the bags it will take to hold it all.
• When you look at the new additions to the list all you have to ask is: “Aren’t redvines and twizzlers like the same thing?”
• To which he replies, “I could have you killed for that, you know.”
• Gladiolus at first says he doesn’t really need anything special, but grasps you by the arm on your way out to declare almost desperately that he “needs shrimp chips” or he “might die by the end of the night.”
• Gladio really has a thing for specifically sea food flavored crisps, and the store by your home has his favorite brand. They’re not bad tasting honestly, but they leave your house smelling like a fishy puddle for days.
• Prompto, bless him, offers to go with you to help out but you decline, pocketing your list and speed walking to the door before anyone can make another request.
• Because if you stay in this room for much longer someone’s probably gonna ask for you to bring them a human kidney and you won’t even question it.
• You’re halfway down the hall before Prom’s head pops out of your apartment door, hands cupped around his mouth in a makeshift megaphone. There’s not even a little bit of an apology in his voice as he SCREAMS.
• “Ice cream, please!!!”
• Now you might be asking “Why can’t the bros just go with you?” And the answer to that is simple.
• Going. To. Any. Kind. Of. Shop. With. Them. Is. Hell. On. Earth.
• The last time you tried it they argued the whole damn time. The younger two disappeared for half an hour and came back with a cart stuff full of half price donuts. Gladio hit on the person at the register in hopes for a discount, and somehow ended up costing you guys more. Prompto broke the slushy machine and ended up slipping in it.
• Poor Iggy looked like a parent who was so torn down and ready to send his children off to military school, and you hate putting him under stress when he’s already got one of the hardest jobs as it is.
• At least when they’re at your house you know they’re not going to be able to get into much trouble. Sure, they could probably set the place on fire but at this point you’ll take your chances.
• You manage to find pretty much everything on the list in record time (and even get a few things for yourself with Noct’s rich-boy-royalty credit card if u catch my drift).
• (You’re almost through shopping when your phone pings, and at first you think it’s the pizza guy needing directions to your place.)
• (Nope.)

• (You’re a sucker for the Pocky game excuse.)
• Good news!
• When you get back to the apartment Noct is so happy that he’s kinda vibrating in place as he looks over his bags of non-nutritious treasures.
• Prompto rips open an ice cream bar and does this little dance that Gladio copies just bc it’s funny.
• It makes Ignis laugh, and your stomach does this wobbly “oh my god my friends are the best” thing.
• So honestly? You feel like you’ve done well. You donea good thing, you think.
• At least until tomorrow, when you’ll be picking candy wrappers out of your window blinds and swiffering crumbs off of every surface in the damn place.
• Ding, ding!
• You better get the door before Gladdy tries to flirt with the pizza guy and ask for a discount.